It Doesn't Even Need a Called Shot

5th September 2019

We find the Beholder in its lair, but doesn't take too kindly to our asking to have one of its eyes. As we find ourselves rather at a disadvantage, we have to adjust our tactics, resulting in Krunch pulling out a Longbow that no one knew he had.

'This doesn't get much use, but here goes nothing.' Despite his rustiness with ranged weapons, the arrow flies true, getting a solid hit on the target. 'Hah, in your face!'

'Where else is it going to hit a Beholder?'

Barbarian versus Rogue

5th September 2019

Krunch the Barbarian thinks he has gone as far with his barbarianism as he can, and chooses to train more as a Rogue from now on. He's quite excited by the opportunities this will allow. 'I can be stealthy now, if I want to be.'

Pigeonhole, our actual Rogue, is happy to offer some advice. 'What armour do you have?'

'Hmm, half plate. I may need to change that.'

'No, keep it.'

'But we have the potential to be all stealthy!'

'Yes, that's why you should keep the armour.'

'But wouldn't I be heard?'

'Making you the main target. Sounds perfect.'

And I Shall Cast Fireball with my Eyes Closed

1st August 2019

'Which one shall I attack?'

'It's not a difficult choice, you only have two targets.'


'Two. That's me, and you know it.'

'I'm doing a Reckless Attack.'

'Okay, three'.

How About a Potion of Self-confidence Next?

25th July 2019

'I quaff a potion of Heroism!

'...not that I need it, you understand.'

I Still Don't Feel Safe

20th June 2019

'I'll move back and eady an action to attack the first thing that I can see in range.'

'Hey, woah, hold up!'

'Ah, yes, you're all in front of me. The first troglodyte that comes in to range.'

That's Why It's an Insult

16th May 2019

'Oh ye of little faith.'

'But I'm a cleric!'

I Set Fraz'Urb-luu Free

9th May 2019

And all I got was this lousy Inspiration.

Catch the Breeze

9th May 2019

We're in the Underdark, on a foldable ship, with the Demogorgan roaring in the distance but getting closer. We may need a burst of speed soon. Muffin has an idea about that. 'I'm going to go to the back of the boat, and face out from the back of the boat as best as possible.'

''As best as possible'? Do you think you'll have trouble doing that?'

'...and get ready to cast Gust of Wind to get us out of here.'

'I've only been the captain of this vessel for a couple of days, granted, but I think you'd have more success if you pointed the Gust of Wind at the sail. It's kinda how they work.'

You Cannot Lie in the Zone of Truth

11th April 2019

Something has been stolen from me, and I intend to find out who has it. My suspicions lie with our rogue, so I turn to him and 'I cast Zone of Truth!'

'You don't have Zone of Truth', says Krunch.

'Well, don't tell him that, magic is mostly showmanship anyways. Okay, gnome, you're now in the Zone of Truth!'

'No I'm not.'

'Okay, that's true. So... maybe the Zone of Truth is working. Gnome, do you have my gem?'


'Hmm, technically it's not my gem, so the question was worded poorly.' The Zone of Truth is a fickle mistress and turns out to be more difficult to manage than I realised. I let the matter lie a little longer, which worked out well when a bandit tried to stab the gnome in his sleep later that night to get the gem.

Cross-classing in to Pacifist

7th March 2019

The duergar have been fighting the gnomes in this enclave for flimsy reasons, and although we've managed to calm the situation somewhat, tensions are high. Trying to deal with the duergar boss isn't helping matters either, as he is being pretty obstinate.

As we leave the duergar quarter, to negotiate with the gnomes, we spy two duergar guards on the bridge, placed there to prevent the gnomes from seeking help from other factions. This rankles me a little, so I suggest that 'maybe we should get rid of those guards, just slaughter them and throw them off the bridge'.

'I think we need more motivation than that', is probably a wise reply, but a bit unexpected from our neutral half-orc barbarian.