Slain by Elf

The dragon landed in the square outside the brewery is not quite as fearsome as we first suspect. On closer inspection, once we were able to convince our ranger to get closer, we note that the dragon is missing its lower jaw and is not looking in best health. Never the less, it is still a dragon and not to be underestimated. But when a certain druid in badger form manages to grab the dragon and hang on by its nuts the dragon is a little more reluctant to make any sudden moves, and the rest of the party close in for the kill.

'Oh you stupid dice. Actually, that may be enough: 26.'

'Against which defence?'

'Will.'

'Good choice, that's a hit!'

'It was more defined by the description of the power rather than a conscious choice, but thanks.' With easy hits like that the dragon is soon defeated, and Krafft comes back from being elsewhere to destroy the poo monster and all its little helpers, making it a fairly simple matter of weakening the dragon rider's defences enough to overwhelm our final foe.

With the combat finished the fire at the brewery can be brought under control, much to Gruknal's relief, and celebratory drinks are embibed. Whilst our dwarf friend can still move his legs we return to the city council to report on the threat to the city and our vanquishing of the threat.

As we describe the creatures we fought and the damage wreaked we feel it important to mention something the dragon rider shouted, Adran announcing that 'General Zack declared there to be an army beneath the city, readying to attack.'

Krafft looks perplexed, as he often does. 'How do we know his name, or that he is a general?'

'It was printed on a label inside his underpants.'

'Did you run back to the square just to read his underpants?!'

'...no.'

'And what are you stuffing hurriedly in to your backpack?'

'Nothing, and certainly not the general's pants.' Luckily for Adran there is an amassing army to distract us back to more important matters of business.

'You come in to the market square, where you see buildings reduced to rubble, dead bodies are lying around in the street, and in the middle of it all is a huge black dragon.'

'Wait a minute, we notice the dragon third?'

'Such are our powers of perception.' Let's hope they are better in the ensuing combat.

The dragon that flew through the portal we finally are able to close doesn't disappear in to the distance to be forgotten until an epic confrontation much later but instead starts attacking the city directly. We probably ought to do something about that, if only because the brewery is in danger of being destroyed, much to Gruknal's alarm, so we dash off to the rescue.

On the way to where the dragon and its rider can be seen wreaking havoc we spy a small band of militia being attacked by some slimey monsters. Even though we could probably help the militia most of us consider a dragon to be a greater threat and choose to keep moving. Grimstorm holds back for a moment to try to offer a little tactical advice.

A perception check on the state of the militia's combat tells him that 'they aren't really working together as a team but as individuals', which is why they battle isn't progressing in their favour.

'Of course I recgonise that,' our shaman retorts, 'I've seen the same lack of strategy in every fight we've been in so far.' With this experience of noticing poor combat strategies Grimstorm is able to turn the fight around with a few quick orders barked towards the militia, a feat that only works this time because the militia are NPCs who will actually pay attention to him.

It is the final task of the second day for the apprentices in the competition to find the most accomplished young samurai. We are collectively given the objective to find some eggs of a certain creature, needing to use our knowledge of hunting to locate and retrieve them. As luck would have it this is a group excercise and one of our number is skilled at hunting and, once we have journeyed the few miles out to the general area, finding the eggs becomes relatively straightforwards.

However, as we turn to make the return journey we are confronted by another contestant samurai, who reveals himself to be an enemy not only of the competition but also the clan who runs it. He admits to sabotaging a couple of the events already before calling us to draw our swords, and we fight.

During the swift combat I am viciously wounded, having taken a couple of firm blows, but our opponent and his small band are driven away. We are still left with the task of returning to the fortress, in time not to be disqualified, whilst I am unable to move faster than a painful limp.

Shika Akira has a solution, 'can't we just put her on a horse?'

'We don't have a horse.'

'Don't we?'

'No. If we did, it would have been perverse not to have ridden it out here rather than jogging the several miles, pulling a horse behind us.' It's a fair point, and it is instead decided that the strongest member of our group tries to carry me the distance.

It is a little uncomfortable for us both, but his strength and stamina get us back to the fortress in good time. We deliver the eggs safely to complete the challenge before reporting the incident with the disgraced samurai and his attempts to sabotage the competition.

Knifey may be retired now but he is still around to share some wisdom with the rest of the guild. During last year's midsummer festival Knifey dared to enter the four Horde capital cities to steal their flames, being rewarded with a neat crown for his efforts. This year's midsummer festival has begun and I, as Gnomesblight the death knight, decide to repeat this intrepid adventure. I have Knifey's knowledge of where the fires are in each of the capitals and it is unlikely that the Horde have moved them, so I head off along with a guild member who is keen to share the experience.

The first target is likely the easiest. Undercity's fire is just inside the entrance to the city, on the surface, making it the shortest trip to steal. Flying to Chillwind Point in the Western Plaguelands and making use of my path of frost ability to travel over water as if it were land makes reaching Undercity quick and easy. Making sure my guild companion is ready, knowing that as soon as we step in to a Horde city we will be marked as fair game for anyone who wants to persuade us with their weapons to leave without us being able to strike pre-emptively, we make a dash for the main entrance. The fire is next to the entrance and to the left, making it easy for us to steal it and beat a hasty retreat before anyone realises what has happened.

The second target must be Silvermoon City, as it is not only on the same continent as Undercity but also in the north. We ride back to Chillwind Point and fly up to Zul'Aman in the Ghostlands. Stopping only to desecrate the Horde flames in Ghostlands and Eversong Woods we quickly reach the entrance to Silvermoon City. Knifey told me that the Horde flame in here is at the end of the charmingly named Murder Row. In we ride, attracting the attention of many guards, only a handful of whom decide to return to their posts to prevent further incursions. Luckily, our mounts are faster than the footmen and we reach the flame at the end of Murder Row with enough time to steal it before the guards reach us. But the guards do reach us and as we are kept in combat we cannot mount to leave.

However, the guards are not quite as strong as we are. Or, at least me, as my companion is a healing druid. I know that Knifey wasn't at the pinnacle of his training, instead lacking a few levels at the time of last year's midsummer celebrations, but the two of us both are at the peak and I have no trouble engaging and defeating a small swarm of guards, particularly as no hostile Horde heroes are around to get involved. Leaving a pile of guard bodies lying around we are able to call our mounts and begin to ride out of Silvermoon City. As we head down to the main entrance I can't help but let out an amused chuckle as a raid of what must be twenty Alliance characters come charging the other way, 'bravely' attempting to steal the Horde flame that we just managed easily as a simple duo.

With two flames stolen there are only two left to take, both in Kalimdor. Two more guild members show up and they join us as we ride to Orgrimmar. Making use of path of frost again we fly to Forest Song in Ashenvale and jump off the bridge that connects to Azshara to head south along the river, riding on the water itself. It is not long before the side entrance to Orgrimmar can be seen, our route bypassing several junctions and a necessary u-turn, making it surprisingly quick. The flame in the busiest of the Horde cities can be found in the Valley of Wisdom, outside Thrall's chamber. I fear this is the most dangerous flame to steal, partly because of the depth needed to penetrate in to the city but mostly because of the population that is likely to be encountered. Heading in the side entrance removes much of the threat of the main gate, which would involve travelling past the crowded buildings of the bank and auction house.

Riding around the back of Orgrimmar still attracts plenty of guards, although the wide and open landscape of the rustic Horde capital allows for some guards to be given a wide berth and avoided. The path soon narrows as we overlook the main courtyard and the threat of our situation grows, but not as much as when we reach the flame. There are many Horde characters taking part in the festivities and although we catch them unawares enough each to grab the flame the appearance and shouts of the guards alerts enough of them for us to be attacked quickly and viciously. We become conscious again at a spirit healer in Durotar, not wishing to attempt to retrieve our bodies in the heart of Orgrimmar, but at least we have the flame.

I learn later from Sapphire, who made the same flame-stealing adventure the next day, that when entering the Valley of Wisdom she moved off the path to hug the wall on the right, where she scampered across a building's roof that overlooked the fire and jumped down mostly unseen and confusing the guards. Using that route, as well as having an advantage of being earlier in the day, Sapphire was able to steal the flame and ride out of Orgrimmar unscathed. Mind you, despite her success in Orgrimmar her run wasn't entirely smooth. A particularly hostile warlock was protecting the Silvermoon City flame well enough to defeat her, although not before she managed to steal it successfully.

Only the Thunder Bluff flame remains to be stolen to complete the collection. We ride from Durotar across to the Barrens, stopping to desecrate the flame at Crossroads, heading south and then west to Mulgore. One more flame is desecrated before heading north to Thunder Bluff itself. Like Orgrimmar—and, I suppose Undercity, although the sewer entrance doesn't help with this particular task—there are two entrances to the Tauren capital. The main entrance is easy and obvious to find, enough to make it rather too obvious despite the likelihood of meeting little or no resistance from powerful Tauren characters. The rear entrance is less-used for being further to travel and offering little advantage for doing so. However, the advantage for us is precisely this lack of use, and the path to the Spirit Rise, where Knifey remembers the flame to be, can be accessed just as easily from either entrance.

The added danger of Thunder Bluff comes from it being situated on the top of tall bluffs that require lifts to reach, needing us either to time our runs or wait for the lifts to descend. It's lucky that Thunder Bluff is quite remote, as few Tauren are around and we are only impeded in our run by some the city guards. There is slight concern as we need to ride through one of the buildings to access the bridge to Spirit Rise, but if done quickly enough our mounts won't get startled and dismiss themselves, and indeed I am able to ride through the building and on to the bridge without being dismounted. The flame is clearly visible on Spirit Rise and we are able to steal it without resistance, at least until a handful of guards catch us.

With plenty of health I jump from the Rise to the ground below, landing painfully but alive. Our priest uses a slow falling spell and our other guild members make it out of Thunder Bluff a little scuffed but otherwise unaffected and we ride back to Alliance territory. Reaching a capital I examine each flame and accept the quest to hand them in, one-by-one, after which the elder grants me a quest to confirm that I have stolen each of the four flames from the Horde capital cities. With this I am awarded the achievement King of the Fire Festival as well as the honour of wearing the associated Crown of the Fire Festival. It has been another glorious start to the midsummer celebrations!

Continuing the tournament of potential young samurai we are taken individually before a panel who test each one of us on our courtly knowledge, politeness and manners. One of the questions concerns the acceptance of gifts.

Kenji-san is surprisingly aware of such matters for a member of the Crab clan and gives the right answer. 'Yes, as you have made clear, one must reject a gift three times before its offering can be considered sincere. Well done, Kenji-san, along with your other answers you have passed this test.'

'It is an honour to be judged wise enough in such matters', he replies, bowing.

'Before you leave, would you like a biscuit?'

'Ooh, thanks, I would.' Despite this transgression, Kenji-san keeps the point he scored in the event.

With a player absent our normal campaign takes a short break. Instead, we play an introductory game of Legend of the Five Rings. We each choose our character from a small selection generated before the session by the GM and note our abilities, characteristics and various strengths and weaknesses.

Our scenario is to compete in a tournament that should see our characters in training become samurai, through a series of events that test martial and social prowess, culminating in a duelling competition to find the most skilled young swordfighter in the realm.

Before we get to the climactic duel there are many more smaller competitions to engage in, starting with basic wrestling. One of the competitors amongst our group, Shiba Akira, looks a little downhearted, noting that 'I am really going to suck at this event'.

'Um, don't you have the 'overconfidence' disadvantage on your character, which means you are confident about your abilities in any activity to the point of arrogance?'

A quick check of the character sheet produces a cry of, 'What I meant to say, of course, was that my opponent will be tasting dirt for a week!'

That's the spirit.

Being attacked by an arachnomancer and his pet spiders threatens opportunities to be poisoned, which a couple of us manage whilst we figuratively try to flush them down the sink. Sadly for Adran, by the end of combat he is still suffering from on-going poison damage. Not having the poison resistance of Gruknal, who has multiple bites but seems completely unaffected by the poison coursing through him, Adran begs for medical aid, hoping to improve his chances of succeeding at the saving throw. 'Someone please put me out of my misery!'

'Oh, gladly!', replies Krafft.

'Is he bloodied?' But our misintepretation is only in jest, according to the DM, and Adran happily shakes off the effects of the poison eventually.

'I have three powers on my weapon alone.'—Adran, compensating for something.

The false priest is uncovered as a doppelganger, a member of the Lonely Hearts Club thieves guild, and a bit of intimidation forces him to reveal that the real priest is locked away in the basement below the warehouse. Upon his release and the incarceration of the doppelganger a further development of the Lonely Hearts Club is discovered, with information that a portal is being opened that will see an army enter the city. Or something like that, I got distracted by a shiny object.

Just as we are about to head off to prevent the opening of yet another portal word reaches us that the house of a prominent cleric is on fire. The priest is almost panicked by the news, as the cleric is one of the few people who has the capability in the city of closing the portal should it be opened, so her rescue could be of great importance. Gruknal, Adran and Grimstorm jump in to action and head off in the direction of a rising cloud of smoke. Krafft and I don't much fancy the tedium of running in to a burning building and instead head off with the priest for some real heroism in trying to prevent the portal from opening in the first place.

Getting to the Stone Anvil church, which the doppelganger priest had assumed control over to disguise the true intention of the Lonely Hearts Club, we rush to find the portal before it is too late. Out of the corner of my eye I spy spiders the size of my hands gathering in the rafters of the church and it soon becomes clear that we must face some guardians first. A swarm of large spiders descends from the ceiling, accompanied by a couple of huge spiders flanking it. Krafft and I ready ourselves for combat.

Facing a swarm and there being only the two of us I decide to unleash my full power early. I use a daily power blast, knowing that swarms are vulnerable to damage from area of effect spells, incidentally dropping the two minions who are also caught in the blast. This seems like a good time to use an action point and on doing so a feat lets me make a basic melee attack, which I can swap for one of my at-will powers that can take place of a basic attack. Shifting back from beast form to elf as a free action my action point attack is another area of effect spell, a burst doing cold damage. It's just enough, as the swarm's vulnerability to area effects sees it disperse.

With no enemies left in the room Krafft asks, 'is it my turn?' Luckily for his rage some scurrying sounds can be heard from the corridor ahead and he charges down it to be faced with more giant spiders. He picks one minion off easily with his weapon before they all move in to attack him. But, even in the confines of the corridor, this is a dangerous tactic against Krafft and his polearm gamble feat, granting him an opportunity attack against any foe that moves next to him. The effect of each minion moving in to melee is that Krafft ends up with a 6-minion kebab on his weapon.

We drop out of initiative as the GM's head drops to the table, muttering 'a swarm and 8 minions killed in the first round of combat, to less than half the party' and what could be either muffled chuckling or crying, it is difficult to distinguish.

'Right, do we get to the portal in time to stop it opening?'

'No. Sadly, you were just too late, as you hear the clumping of footsteps further down the corridor.'

'Too late?! We were in combat for less than six seconds!' But we simply weren't quick enough for the plot to overtake us, it seems. Luckily, the plot also allows the rest of the party to turn up at that point, albeit a little singed. 'Oh, hi. Did you rescue the woman from the fire?'

'Um, no. We failed the skill challenge. My rolls were just as shabby as they were last week!', complains Adran, apparently suffering from breathing too much smoke.

'Let's be honest, it wasn't that your rolls were poor', Gruknal interjects, 'more that they reflected your actions. You weren't looking for the unconscious dwarf as much as trying to rescue the priceless tapestry, unburning magical urn, the statue that no longer has jewels for eyes... How did you get on with keeping the portal from opening?'

'Ah. Let's find out, shall we?'