Slain by Elf

Not much progress has been made along Knifey's XP bar this week, apart from a late run through Maraudon that garnered experience only for the latter half of the dungeon. Instead, with the old level cap of 60 approaching, thoughts of buying a swift steed are on my mind. Whilst it's true that a gnome on a pony is a splendid sight to behold, the swift ponies are rather dull in comparison to other swift mounts. It would be easy enough to get a swift mechanostrider but I thought I'd aim to ride that underused mount, the ram. I managed to get Tiger, my night elf warrior, trained to ride rams, but that was after reaching level 70 and involved getting the last few thousand Ironforge reputation through buying piles of runecloth from the auction house to make the cloth quartermaster happy. After getting the pony through questing only, I wanted to make Ironforge happy the same way.

As gnomes and dwarves still start in the same area, I got a good head start on the reputation gain for Ironforge, and meant that I didn't have to risk annoying too many new adventurers by whizzing through the beginner's quests, but I visited Kharanos and Steelgrill's Depot in Dun Morogh to see what I had left behind. Quite a bit, it seems. I must have left the snowy region early to head for the balmy climate of Elwynn Forest to gain some quick levels. I picked up all the quests available and started running around, stab-happy. One point to note is that quests requiring drops are much slower to complete than the archetypal 'kill ten rats' quests, if only because you have to stop to loot bodies in the former type.

Western Dun Morogh was cleared of wildlife, including trolls, fairly quickly, and I moved on the the Gol'Bolar Quarry further east. I always remember there being more quests at the quarry, but I only found two when I turned up this time. And apart from the ranch nearby, that is all the quests I could find in eastern Dun Morogh, which makes the large expanse seem quite empty.

The lack of further progression prompted me to move onwards to Loch Modan. Well, that and the couple of quests that tell me to go to Loch Modan. I started with the southern guard tower where I was tasked to started wiping out the local troglodyte infestation. With one quest to kill certain types of troglodyte and another to pick up some of their teeth I ran a little way north and stabbed with abandon in the troglodyte camp. It was after I did this that I realised my current frustration. Instead of Westfall's large number of concurrent quests, I was currently stuck with running back-and-forth to complete sequential quests. Granted, I was stuck in one part of Loch Modan, but that too is where Westfall succeeds in being free to quest.

In Westfall you would hear 'hey, Knifey, can you kill some Defias for me, and this chap would like it if you picked up some of their bandanas, and can you do something about the gnolls around here, and that fellow to the north is troubled by harvest reapers, and his wife wants lots of animal guts for a pie, and if you could pick up some oats for Old Blanchy at the same time it would be much appreciated.' And off you trot killing anything that comes within range with a good probability that you were meant to be killing them.

My current questing was a frustrating 'Kill some trogs, would you? ... Oh, I thought you wouldn't make it back, but as you have why not try killing some tougher trogs? ... Knifey, how's it going? Still not dead? Okay, well, you remember those named trogs, the ones you saw whilst on my last task for you? Yeah, I'd like you to go ahead and kill them. No, I don't care that you killed them before. That would be great.' Grr.

After southern Loch Modan I moved up to Thelsamar, and those took me a little further around the map, including close to the Farstrider Retreat. The Retreat is a hunting lodge tucked right in the south-eastern corner of the map, with a few quests available. No one sends you there, and the lodge is not obvious to find unless you try to explore all of the map, so it is easy to overlook. And even though the occupants are from Ironforge only one of the quests, collecting crocolisk skins, gains Ironforge reputation, so it's almost best to overlook the place.

'Almost best', because after saving the dam and moving on to Wetlands, where I had completed the Dun Modr quests previously, the number of Ironforge quests seems to be much thinner on the ground than the large number of Stormwind quests. It wasn't entirely straightforward to become exalted with Stormwind, but it didn't seem like a titanic struggle, and yet I have an extra 15 levels worth of quests to aid me in Ironforge reputation gains and am wondering where the last few thousand reputation is coming from.

My reputation bar had shifted a good 10,000 points since I started hitting the grey quests, aiming for the swift ram mount, but there was a fair bit to go. There's a couple of thousand left in Wetlands, and after that I'm struggling. I've wandered through Badlands and Searing Gorge, even completing the Searing Gorge gate key quest for some good gains, and have a few quests handed out in Ironforge itself, all 50+ quests too, but can't think of another dwarfy place to adventure. I could investigate whether Gnomeregan gives as much Ironforge reputation for completing its quests as it does for the gnome faction, and there is always Uldaman. Brr, Uldaman. I'd rather not go back in there, but it's a possibility for another thousand or two reputation. Other than that, it's back to handing in runecloth.

I have some levels to go before I hit 60 and can get trained to ride swift mounts, and there are some opportunities left to gain more reputation with Ironforge. But after running through so many quests, and with Uldaman being the 'Ironforge' dungeon, I have new-found respect for any non-dwarf that manages to get a ram at 40th level.

Being berated for allowing the death of a noble merchant in the town the previous night forces us to take an active approach to eliminating the Marrowbreaker threat in town instead of waiting for them to come to us. That means we need to think of a plan. Dexter comes up with the idea of getting a coach load of amphibious cheerleaders, but is a little sketchy on why they are needed and what they would do. Nevertheless, he is quite happy that no one spurns his idea, considering that to be quite the positive response. 'I decided to wait until we had a better plan before I spurn it', notes Ann-See.

'I have a better plan', I chime in, 'let's not do Dexter's plan.'

'Yep, that is a better plan.' This prompts Ann-See to action. Despite not being able to determine whether the Marrowbreakers' lair has breathable air before, now that Ann-See is able to make risky decisions herself, rather than as a committee of macabre spectators when her player was absent, she decides to head back in to the creature's underwater tunnel. With her greater speed Ann-See can get further in before needing to return, allowing a greater chance of finding the lair or an air pocket.

'What's your skill in 'swim'?', the GM asks, picking up Ann-See's character sheet to check. 'Oh, you don't have ranks in 'swim'. But you do have ranks in 'swin'. What is 'swinning'?'

'I dunno. Maybe I'll just make a 'swin' check and force you to work out what I've succeeded in.'

Even with Ann-See swinning an air pocket is found, quickly followed by the creatures' lair. As quickly as it is found it is also abandoned, with Ann-See returning to let us know what is down there instead facing it alone. One thing that Ann-See noticed was that the creature in the lair was quite badly hurt, so if we were to strike now would be the best time. We weigh our options about going in through the tunnel or trying to find another way in, trying to determine where the tunnel leads under the town.

Knowing that the tunnel is mostly straight and heads inland we check the lay of the land in the direction of the tunnel. 'When you look in that direction you see that the hill shopes... I mean, 'slopes'... quite steeply'.

'How do you get up a 'shope'? Does it require a 'swin' check'? Even if it did require a 'swin' check with only Ann-See having the 'swin' skill we are better off heading down the tunnel itself.

Knowing that there is an air pocket sufficiently close for anyone to be able to catch their breath, and that we'll be facing the creature in its lair, we enter the tunnel prepared. With the fighters at the front, and Ann-See and I carrying a wax cloth-protected torch and lantern for light sources once we get out of the water, we head down. The creature waits for us, clearly quite injured, and attacks when we enter. It was so badly hurt that it doesn't last long, despite still being a fearsome grappling opponent. One of the Marrowbreakers is dead! That only leaves one more to kill.

Well, two, if you count the extra one that we then woke up when exploring the exits to the lair that led to an ancient temple. Oh, and a potential demi-god-like creature we also awoke from a century-old slumber. Still, we have some progress to report to the town leader. I'm sure she'll see the positive side.

Ambush is a great opening move, doing a great deal of damage, but having a sword in the main hand prevents its use. I started using Cheap Shot as my opening move, which deals no damage but gives two combo points that I can then use immediately for Slice and Dice. This lets various talents kick in, for chances at gaining energy or combo points back, and by the time the Cheap Shot wears off I have done a significant amount of damage anyway. However, stunning a target as an opening move is far from team-friendly, particularly in an instance against elite mobs where the tank wants to gain rage and control the mobs.

Having picked up an excellent new one-handed sword from the Sunken Temple, and then rewarded with an equally excellent one-handed dagger as a quest reward from the same dungeon, I performed a little experiment. I put the dagger in the main hand, allowing the use of Ambush as the opening move, and the sword in the off-hand. My main concern was what effect this would have on my Sword Specialisation talent, gaining me the chance of an extra attack after hitting with the sword. After all, if Ambush only works with a dagger in the main hand, not in the off-hand, is it the same for the specialisation? A few quick stabs of some random troll guinea pigs in Tanaris and I find that I still get the extra swing proccing. Excellent.

Now I just need to consider how having a slower weapon in the off-hand may affect poison applications and DPS.

Having been tasked by the head of the Rogue's Guild to get a key in the Sunken Temple, and with a handful of quests from around the world for the same dungeon, Knifey and friends went in to the Swamp of Sorrows to explore the temple. The Sunken Temple is quite an interesting dungeon, but isn't for the faint of heart. There are zombies, maggots, dragonkin and dragons all guarding the temple, and quite a few secrets to uncover.

The first secret is its layout. Trying to find your way to the front door can be a bit of an adventure, and once you are inside the labyrinthine corridors become more confusing. There is a lot to be said for getting a seasoned adventurer to act as a guide, which is how my previous incarnations all seemed to have quested in the temple. This time we had no guide, just two characters who had been there before, at least a year previously, and the others had not ventured there before. Even a dusty map was little use, with the many different levels of the temple proving far too awkward to represent on a two-dimensional piece of parchment.

With someone to act as a guide the adventuring goes fairly quickly, cutting down beasts who are out for blood as we jog from one area to another, down some stairs, up some more, then back down to get above where we started, confusingly. It's all part of The Plan though, and soon enough the temple's secrets are unlocked and we find ourselves back outside breathing fresh air, as fresh as swamp air can be at least.

Without a guide you get to hear a gnome rogue utter such statements as 'this place is more confusing than Undercity', and 'when I said we wanted to go down, I did of course mean up'. With a circular layout to the inside and many identical chambers, only differentiated by points on a compass, finding which stairs lead to which areas can be an amusing exercise in running blindly in to waiting monsters. And I do mean 'exercise'. Have you seen how many stairs there are in the temple? If gnomes had built that place their would be a transporter or two, I can tell you that much. Even dwarfs would have built lifts.

The positive aspect of no one knowing where they are going, and thus blindly running around the same area again and again, is that after a while, either through learning or sheer embarrassment, the layout is slowly picked up. Sure, maybe rats learn quicker than adventurers, but gnomes are better dancers. And in the end we no longer need a guide, for we are guides ourselves.

Apart from the network of corridors and rooms to navigate, there was also the impediment of monsters to overcome. It was not too difficult to start with, having my rogueish sap to stun one troll opponent, the priest's shackle to hold a zombie, and a warlock to banish an elemental. The big guys could be controlled with ease and the little monsters that littered the place were nothing more than a distraction because of that. But soon enough the warlock and another chap had to leave, making us three. A rogue, priest and warrior. New and enthusiastic help came in the form of another rogue and a mage, and better still they were both gnomes. Only good things can come of this!

Unfortunately this is a temple of two halves. Before too long the susceptible zombies and trolls had been replaced by dragonkin. The entire chamber before us was filled with dragonkin. Dragonkin, who aren't affected by a rogue's sap. Dragonkin, immune to shackles, and a mage's polymorph. I wouldn't say we had a problem, just a challenge. We had between two and five elite monsters to defeat per fight, and when there were fewer elites a whole bunch of minions came along too. Some strategy may be in order.

The mage's awesome firepower against multiple opponents made her a good choice for defeating the minions, and she was happy to do this. Us two stab-happy rogues would take on the elite mobs one-by-one, keeping them stunned as much as possible using our nefarious abilities. The warrior held the attention of the others, effectively queueing them for destruction whilst keeping the priest safe. This worked well, each character playing to his strengths, and the monsters fell quickly and assuredly.

Only when the Avatar of Hakkar arose were there any casualties, and as we were fighting the spirit of a god it wasn't surprising. Even so, we were victorious. We went on to kill Morphaz for the class quests, and finished by defeating Eranikus and gaining his essence. We entered as brave yet wary adventurers, and exited as masters of the Sunken Temple.

Knifey the rogue hit the 50 mark recently, and it really doesn't seem like it took long at all. Well, okay, it was two months ago that he got his pony at 40, but having to spend a month without being able to play can really put a flat-spot in the levelling process. When Knifey is gnome about the wilderness in Azeroth he advances quickly.

I encountered the mid-level drudgery that used to be wandering the jungles of Stranglethorn Vale and, apart from gaining Stormwind reputation in Kurzon's camp, I avoided pretty much all of that once-dreaded area. I eschewed the barely-disguised grind of Nessingwary's culling quests, and only ventured out of Booty Bay to kill pirates with friends. Who can say 'no' to that? Instead, I headed to the newly-landscaped Dustwallow Marsh. The goblins had done a lot of work and had even helped out Tabetha, making paths to her cottage and even signposting the way. No more guessing where her place is and having to avoid huge crocolisks to get there. Maybe she doesn't quite have the hermit status any more, but on the positive side she has a couple of acolytes to help her out.

The new Dustwallow Marsh quests at Mudsprocket aren't exactly shaped from a different mould, but they are new and in a different zone and so are more interesting to complete than killing 10 rats. Sorry, 'panthers'. The quests in Theramore Isle itself are fairly interesting, culminating in killing a huge marine beast with big cannons. It's on a scale that looks important and involving, even changing the weather when the quest starts.

After the mid-level lull there is a refreshing change of pace. There are the usual quests to complete in Tanaris, either in Gadgetzan or Steamwheedle Port, which aren't that much better than Stranglethorn Vale, and Searing Gorge is starting to become available too. But the joy of levelling is found with even a single visit to an instance. Running through Zul'Farrak with a few quests will get you over a level quickly enough, and combined with a handful of quickly-completed quests in the wild gets you ahead pretty fast. Zooming through Searing Gorge with the quest density there gets the levels flowing too. Soon enough you find that Felwood, Azshara, Western Plaguelands and even Burning Steppes are calling to you. When not too long ago you wondered if there was anything outside of Stranglethorn Vale and now the world opens up completely.

Fifty comes quickly, and with it dozens of new quests. Because the quest XP is increased significantly the amount of time spent in one zone is reduced and it is possible to spend only a short time in each area before moving on. This lets a character linger in his favourite places, or move on quickly from the less desirable areas. The only problem is that if you enjoy two areas of similar difficulty playing in one will likely out-level you from the other, such is the speed of the level gain. That's not to say you won't be able to go and quest in both areas, but the feeling of progression will be lost on picking up low-level quests and getting quest rewards that are already useless. I think the opportunity to explore the world and see new sights with regularity is a fair trade-off for this, though.

One big difference with the fast levelling is the rate of loss of rested experience. It once was that a full rested XP bar would be difficult to consume for the average player, who could not spend as much time in-game as out, leading to a character getting double experience for kills from level 40 or so right through to the old level cap of 60. But no more. Even with large chunks of experience handed out for quest completion, which doesn't eat in to the rested XP, the extra experience given for mobs pushes that experience bar out so quickly that even with a full week's rested XP at one's disposal it can run out within a session or two. Of course, with a week's rested XP equally a level-and-a-half of double experience gain, that highlights how quickly a level or two can be gained in-game.

If more proof is needed that levelling is mighty quick, for anyone who hasn't levelled an alt recently, in the time between reaching 50 and sitting down to write this, Knifey had a quick trip in to the Sunken Temple and, between getting the quest chains and completing the quests in there, is now 54! The level progression is quite dizzying in its speed. It won't be long before the Dark Portal calls me.

Having found out where the Marrowbreakers return after feasting on bones we are a step closer to finding their lair, and thus defeating them and stopping the murders. And because we believe the Red Hand Gang are responsible for loosing the creatures on the town, and that the cult are on the precipice of creating mass destruction, finding the Marrowbreakers is currently our best way to find the cult and stop their nefarious plans.

With little sign of swimming or bubbles under the murky waters we assume that there is a tunnel leading to the lair. A quick poke with a ten foot pole confirms that there is an opening in the bank beneath the water. What we need to find out now is where it leads and, perhaps more importantly, if it leads to a dry lair, for we don't know if the Marrowbreakers can breathe underwater or not.

Being nimble enough to manoeuvre in a narrow tunnel I volunteer to find out what I can. My plan is to head down the tunnel as far as I can get before I won't have enough breath to get back again. If I find an air pocket or dry section then I will head back to let the rest of the party know before continuing. 'What's your contingency plan if I don't come back?', the GM asks the others.

'Umm, panic', comes the reply. Okay, we have our respective plans in order! I ease myself in to the waste that dares call itself water and start heading up the tunnel.

'What's your swim check?', asks the GM.

'11', I tell him. The GM pauses and looks at me expectantly, and I realise what extra information he is waiting for. 'Plus 11!' I let him know, surprised that he expected differently, considering my light armour and surplus of skill points. 'Who do you think I am, Dexter?'

'Hey!' interjects Dexter indignantly, 'my swim check isn't that... wait, no, it is in fact minus 11. Carry on.' And carry on up the tunnel I go. I am not able to find any kind of breathing space after any comfortable amount of time underwater and decide that heading back is probably safer than expecting a breathable atmosphere to present itself ahead. After catching my breath on the river bank I let the others know this, and relay that the tunnel appeared to be heading almost directly under the hill behind the bank. That's probably information we could use at some point.

But we have another plan. With our town guard chaperones still with us, Harry and Tarquin, we order one of them off to find a good, sturdy cage, with a sliding door, on George's orders. We then spend the day setting the cage in the water directly in front of the tunnel entrance, and I rig the door with a tripwire to shut the door when a big enough creature enters the cage. For we are expecting the tunnel entrance also to be an exit, an assumption we consider to be fairly safe. The plan is to trap at least one of the Marrowbreakers coming out of the tunnel, and probably trapping the other in the tunnel if it doesn't get in to the cage. Then we can poke the creature with spears, or even hope it drowns. Either way, we lift its corpse out of the water in the morning. It actually sounds like a feasible plan.

We sit on watch that night, close to the cage. Sure enough, at some point the door slides down and our alarm system alerts us to this. We rush in to action and start poking in to the cage with spears, hurting whatever beast is in there. But we also start to hear a terrible rending of metal coming from under the water, and before long all the underwater commotion has stopped and there is no more resistance felt from the spearing. 'We're going to need a bigger cage.'

The good news is that the second Marrowbreaker was trapped in the tunnel, unable to force its way past the now-closed cage at the tunnel entrance. The bad news is that the one that got free killed again that night, and is lurking in the river somewhere now that it is daytime again. Not only that, but the fellow he killed was a wealthy merchant, who ignored the warnings about going out at night alone. It's likely he thought his wealth made him immune to attack from mere animals, and we even suggest that his last words may have been 'You can't kill me, I pay my taxes!' Even so, the death of an upper-class citizen is going to increase significantly the pressure on us to stop the creatures.

Travelling with the general, we make it to the capital of Borat. Is nice. Apart from being a police state and recently suffering from a spate of nighttime murders, that is. After giving our evidence about the riot in Copperdell we are approached by the rulers of the state to help investigate the murders. As we have some evidence that the Red Hand Gang are operating in the city, possibly with some Gloom-like creatures that we have read referred to as 'Marrowbreakers', this gives us a good cause to hang around and investigate whilst performing a good deed.

Putting on our collective brown mac, puffing on a large cigar, and adopting a gruff accent we head to the latest murder scenes. Our first rule of murder investigations is to remember to keep one seemingly-trivial question back until just as we're walking out the door. That way we can turn around at the last second and ask, 'Just one more thing, sir...'. Most of our questions are answered by the dead bodies, however. Dexter's keen medical examination of one shows that the limbs were crushed quite easily, and all the wounds were made not by weapons. Moreover, a close look reveals that the very marrow of the bones was eaten. It looks like we have a solid lead! No suspicions of snakes leaving claw marks here, no sir.

To both protect the citizens of Borat and hopefully to find what the Red Hand Gang are up to we decide to lay a trap to catch and kill one of the Marrowbreakers, for our investigations revealed there are at least two on the loose. As the murders happen at night, are centred on a particular area, and we know the escape route of the beasts we have a good chance of luring one. But to guarantee it we need some bait. The best bait would be some living animal with chunky marrowbone to eat in to, but expendable. Sadly, Tal is now conscious, having recovered from his ability drain from the fight with the Gloom, so we have to make do with a goat.

The plan works, and the Marrowbreaker is ensnared by the goat during the night. We spring in to action and try to defeat it. But it senses that it is outnumbered and threatened and fights its way to escape. The guards we posted along its escape route witness its movements but, wisely, do not engage it and are unable to follow. Whilst we are not strictly closer to preventing the plans of the Red Hand Gang, we have prevented at least one murder during the night, seen what we are fighting, and confirmed the evidence of our investigations. We are making good progress so far. High five!

The riot has been quelled! The instigators have agreed to turn themselves in to prevent further bloodshed, with a promise of leniency because of the underhand dealings of the town's (now ex-) captain. The root cause of the riot was the disappearance of some mining gear, official town property. This was found and returned, and the person who took the gear has been revealed as an evil cutlist intent on bringing the destruction of civilisation. All in a day's work for us.

The General who hired us on behalf of the capital city is pleased with the result, and wishes us to return to the capital with him to present a report of what happened. Tal is still somewhat unconscious from the fight with the Gloom, but we imagine he wouldn't mind coming along. Even George is okay with this, as despite being a deserter from the army his work in the town has all but got him an official pardon. But we still need a way to get Tal moving, and manage to do so by using an improvised method.

As we are leaving town, we hear from behind us the newly-appointed town captain is updating the inventory to ensure that all the missing mining gear is now accounted for. Just before we get out of hearing range, his voice is raised as he declares that they are still short one piece of equipment and that there will be trouble if it isn't found, intact or otherwise, soon! We think about running ahead to tell General Juthe there may be a new storm brewing but as we are weighed down, pushing Tal in the wheelbarrow used for carrying ore that we borrowed, we decide against it. I'm sure it's nothing.

Onwards to the city of Borat!

The Dire Gloom has me in its clutches, slowly draining me of all my charisma. My personal situation looks rather bleak, but overall things are going quite well. For a start, I am the least combative member of the party and I am keeping the dangerous beast occupied. Had anyone else in the party been snared by the Gloom so early in the fight we may have had a difficult time fighting down the minions before we were subdued. Of course, I have time to muse over this as I have little on my mind except for a sucking tentacle. Even so, Il try to escape when I can, but the vice-like grip the monster has on my body is proving difficult to slip out of.

As I am struggling for breath, the others are doing fine work as always. George, Tal, Ann-See and Dexter are all taking down the minions with little disruption. Someone has the forsight to sunder the boss's rapid-firing crossbow that is threatening to turn anyone in range in to a pin cushion. After that is accomplished, Tal and Ann-See rush the house, Ann-See zooming around the boss to keep his attention, stopping to slip her blade in to a weak spot before dancing around him again. Tal tries to help me with the Dire Gloom and, unfortunatelyfor him, he succeeds. Tal joins the monster's grapple with me to start damaging it and shortly after he does I manage to slide out of the Gloom's grasp. The Gloom decides that instead of pursuing me it will snack on Tal instead.

With my feeble attacks and lack of defences against such a strong monster I head in to the next room to help take down the boss, which happens soon after I arrive thanks to all the work done by the others up to that point. Just the Gloom is left to defeat, and it's chugged down Tal's charisma and starting to taste his constitution as a dessert. All our fighters jump on to the Gloom and hit it wherever it looks like it might hurt. Eventually, the Gloom dissipates in what we assume is its death, leaving behind a comatose Tal on the floor. He's going to need some bed rest. And someone to carry him to a bed. But we prevail once again, and we'll get Tal back on his feet.

Getting out of harm's way, it is a plan that never fails, and one that I put to use as much as I can, being a squishy thief. I have the means to achieve the plan as well, being spry and nimble, able to dodge opponents, tumble past them, or leap to safety. Whether the opponents ambush us from the rear or storm past the front-line fighters I can spot a position of relative safety and aim to get there to regroup. After all, I tend to be more of an aid to the party alive, if not directly in battle, than bleeding and taking up healing resources. That's how I feel about it, at least.

And so I find myself rather exposed, although not in any immediate or direct danger, after the party heads to find a rebel leader to convince him to turn himself in to the authorities. He needs to do this, we will plead, to save much more suffering, and we have as much of a promise as possible that he will be treated justly. At least, that was our intention, but he set his cronies on us and started firing his rapidly-firing crossbow in our direction before we even got to knock on his door. I guess we were expected, after all.

With several enemies firing bows or crossbows at us from different directions, and some others moving in to melee, we need to turn the tables quickly and gain the upper-hand before we get bogged down in numbers. Dexter, George and Tal all charge in the most promising directions, pinning down some of the enemy, and Ann-See quickly despatches a couple of the archers, sending them running with near-deadly wounds. Which leaves me, not one for ranged combat, neither one for engaging multiple opponents. And with an archer or two still threatening, I look for my place on the battlefield.

The rebel leader is looking deadly from the window of his house, but there's another window in a different room that is open, and it is in the same room as the front door. The front door that has an opponent fighting Dexter. I have found my place, for it is a simple manoeuvre to hustle down the hill, jump through the window, and tumble up behind Dexter's doorway defiler, providing a flanking bonus and positioning myself to put a knife in to his spleen in the near future.

No one had seen that ominous shadow in the building. After all, it was gloomy in there, and how do you discern one shadow from another? Or, indeed, a Dire Gloom from a shadow? No sooner am I behind the man in the door than the Dire Gloom encountered before returns and begins to engulf me. Being separated from the rest of the party and not being terribly strong the Gloom wraps itself around me quite effectively, and starts pushing its essence down my throat hentai-style. I feel my very being slipping away, drained from me by this monster, and despite my best attempts at escaping its embrace I put up only a slight struggle against it.

Yes, it's a plan that never fails, getting out of harm's way. It's just that it never fails to put me in to more danger than I started in.